Humans are designed to adapt to repeat stimulus. And we do it remarkably well.
Let’s say you walk into a room and smell fresh baked cookies. Even if cookies are your favorite food in the world, your brain will only register the smell for a few minutes, and then it will begin to filter out that information so it can focus on other things. Unless something changes about the smell, it will no longer captivate your interest. You’ll stop smelling the cookies. Our brains are designed to get used to the things in our lives that stay the same, and when they stop stimulating us we stop noticing them.
The same is true with the people in our lives. Whenever you get into a rut, your partner eventually grows accustomed to you as you are, and there’s a degree to which they will grow bored. It’s completely natural – if you’ve stayed the same, if you haven’t changed or pursued your dreams, then you become less stimulating to your partner.
So, are you both changing and growing and actively striving to live your best life; to be your best selves? Or have you put your own personal growth on the back burner? We all have challenges, we all have times when we’re not living as well as we’d like. That’s completely normal and ok. But it comes down to this: if you want your ideal relationship, you’ve got to work on being the ideal you as well as the ideal partner. Get healthy – stay healthy – both emotionally and physically. Do your inner work, own your self worth, find your passion, and live a life of purpose.
If you do this, not only will you begin to enjoy life more, you’ll find that the relationship is enhanced by the work that you’re doing – on you.
Remember: We control fifty percent of a relationship. We influence one hundred percent of it.
The sexiest, most attractive thing in the world is a person who is living their dreams. And when two people make their own life purpose a priority, I guarantee that the relationship will grow by leaps and bounds. You are the greatest gift that you will ever give to your partner. And when you step up and begin to make you genuinely great, you’re giving your spouse something that they will love and appreciate forever. And odds are, you’ll inspire them to do the same. People love to be in love with people who are in love. I’ll say that again. People love to be in love with people who are in love. So be that person.
A person who grows and evolves and is in love with their life is an exciting person to be, and an exciting partner to have. When both of you are making positive changes in your own lives, the sparks will fly.